2010
18
Mar

Proposed Units of Measure

The word “few” is commonly used to describe an amount. Though many people assume when someone says “few”, they mean 3 or in the neighborhood of 3 of whatever they are referring to. There is not a specific number that represents the word “few.” It gives a rough idea of the total amount.

So I have come up with a few more types of words that can describe an amount:

couple few:
More than a few, but not by much. This could be double the amount of what “few” typically refers to. For example, “I have a couple few pairs of shoes.”

crap load:
A large amount, but not large enough that it is not under control. For example, “I have a crap load of debt!” As in the example, this would generally be an exclamatory statement. Emphasis can be added to the word “crap” to imply even more than what “crap load” would typically imply.

shit ton:
An very large, almost unbelievable amount. This amount would generally describe a very, very large number. For example, “There is a shit done of dust in the attic!” As in the example, this would generally be an exclamatory statement. Emphasis can be added to the word “shit” to imply even more than what “shit ton” would typically imply.

All of these are context-sensitive amounts. If someone says, “There are a shit ton of people on the planet Earth,” you would assume “shit ton” is roughly 6,800,000,000. On the other hand, is someone says, “I lost a shit ton of weight.” You would never think they lost 6,800,000,000 pounds. Instead, the amount of “shit ton” would take into account their current weight. Since it is a good, round number, let’s say 200 pounds. In this case, “shit ton” would mean they lost roughly 150-200 pounds they previously had.

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